Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Driving around in my automobile...or something like that

These are pictures of the car I drive to occupational therapy school everyday. I'm posting it because it's really quite...amusing. This illustrates the life of a graduate student perfectly.

I don't have a car. I sold my last car to pay for school. My dad is loaning me this car until he decides he wants to (fix it and) sell it. The car do you say

First, if you can tell from the picture, the hood is black and the rest of the car is bluish green. A very faded bluish green, but, that's a minor detail :-)

The pipe leading to the muffler has not one, but TWO, holes in it so the muffler is SUPER LOUD. Once when I went to visit my mother she opened the door for me before I rang the bell. She says: Do you know how I knew it was you? I heard you waaaaay down the street. (Naturally, she could hardly get this out because she was laughing so hard) Sometimes I like to pretend I'm driving in Nascar or the Indy 500. Sometimes I'm actually convinced my name is Jeff Gordon.

I think only two of the wheels have hubcabs. It might drop down to one real soon. You just never know...

I always pray no one drives in the blind spot on my right side. It's hard to see other cars when there is no right side mirror. I'm very adept at looking over my right shoulder now. I'd like to say I'm an expert.

If I ever get pulled over by the cops there may be a huge problem. He'll ask for my license and insurance and I'll have to give it to him through the passenger side window because the driver side window does not roll down more than a half inch. It also does not roll up completely either. So the window is always open about 1/2 inch. Yes, in the summer this sucks. Yes, in the winter this sucks. Yes, when it's raining this sucks. Yes, when it's snowing...well, you get the idea.

Most cars start in first gear when you push the gas pedal from the brake. But this car is oh so special! It starts in second or third gear, so you have to really push the gas pedal to get about 3-4 feet of movement. This takes about 10-15 seconds longer than most cars so people almost always honk at me at a stoplight. I'm strongly considering cutting out the platform and fueling the car with my feet. Yes, just like the Flintstones. It will work, I know it!

The stalling engine is even more pronounced when someone else is in the car. My friend and I went to a party and because we live near each other he wanted me to drive. He is 6 feet tall 200 pounds, solid muscle. It took us 2 minutes to get from one stoplight to the next because take-off was so slow. The 15-minute trip to the party took 45 minutes. After the party (and a few drinks), as we're driving home, he said: C'mon, I'll get out and race you home. I bet I win.

And, to top it all off, the car has a car alarm complete with remote. So now I can be super cool as I press the button and hear that well-known 'boop boop boop' car alarm sound. But of course, it's not just any alarm. It's the LOUDEST car alarm on all of Earth. As my running friend so eloquently stated, "This little sh*t car has an alarm?"

My glass is half FULL.
My glass is half FULL.
My glass is half FULL.
My glass is half FULL.
:-) :-) :-) :-) :-)

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